Bioshock review

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Thoughts on 'Knocked Up,' 'The Departed'

I'm sick of the thumb-sucking critcal backlash to popular films like 'Knocked Up' and 'The Departed.'

After receiving overwhelmingly positive reviews (92% on Rotten Tomatoes) those indie-art-house-apologists are out in full force -- especially on the message boards.

One of the main problems I'm hearing -- no way a beautiful blonde falls in love with "unlovable" schlub Seth Rogen. I wish everyone could have read the same article in RollingStone that I did. It's an interview with the film's director and writer Judd Apatow. In it, he responds to his critics: "Look at me and my wife!" Indeed, he is married to a beautiful blonde (Paul Rudd's wife in the film) and he and Seth Rogen both got beat by the same stick. So stick it.

As for The Departed, it pains me to see such a disregard for what most movies are lacking: Entertainment. Here's an idea: people want to see a cast of their favorite actors in a film. They are fun to watch and great at what they do. They want to be stimulated by a plot, they want action, suspense and romance. And if they're anything like me, they want to see a lot of crazy Irish gangsters drink Jack Daniels and beat the shit out of each other.

Better than 'Goodfellas'? Who cares. Sometimes it takes more guts to give a movie a great rating than a poor one. And 'The Departed' deserves all the praise it gets.

What I Learned at College: Sext Education

This is a Catholic, Jesuit University (we should get a dollar every time someone writes a Viewpoint with that phrase), so I want to make sure everyone is aware of a serious epidemic going on around campus. It's been mentioned in a few fashion magazines and in places on the Internet, but it's high time someone addressed it at the college level.

I'm talking about sext, baby. Someone cue Salt 'N Pepa.

It's time for sext education and I'm not going to mince any words. Sext is when you put something on your cell phone, push all the right buttons, and a new text message is created.

Sexting is most common between males and females, but same sex sexts have been known to have been sent.

Probably the most famous sext in the world (some even call it "The sext typed 'round the world") occurred when Britney had sext with K-Fed to tell him they were getting a divorce. There is nothing more depressing than break-up sext. However, there is a flip side: make-up sext. This can be quite enjoyable as you are finally sexting the person you used to sext all the time.

Sexting is a natural extension of the phone and Internet for our generation - it gets us further away from actual people. As we all know, this has its benefits.

Here's a real-life example: Say a nice young gentleman sext's "I want 2B feelin' on yo booty 2nite." Nice! You sext back and say "Don't you have a girlfriend?" And they sext "Not tonight!" You've already had sext three times, with no ramifications! It's then up to you if you want to face this person in real life. Sextperts call this sext "safe-sext." To be fair, there is controversy over whether one can actually have "safe-sext," as the above example could still (although highly unlikely) result in unwanted texts you may not be able to handle or afford.

"Unsafe sext" almost always results in unwanted texts and should be avoided, although in the heat of the moment you may feel the urge to fire a few off.

If you sext a lot, some people find it more comfortable to put a small rubber capsule over whatever appendage you use for sext. Without this accessory, you are risking blisters and a lot of other unsightly ailments - sometimes even death.

Some people like to tell stories about where they have sexted. There is a "Mile High Club" for those able to send such a message from many miles in the air, where it's nearly impossible to get a cell phone signal. From what I've been told, most people sext in the bathroom stall on the plane. They must get better reception there.

The practice of sexting can be so fun, many do it in class, in cars, or in public bathrooms. These people are called "sext addicts."

Sexting goes deep into our cultural lexicon. You know that song that goes "I wanna sext you up?" It's a little known fact, but the song is about how this guy sexted this girl, like 10 times in one night. Awesome.

A lot of people feel uncomfortable with just saying the word "sext," much less discussing it, even though it's a major part of life. If people bring it up they become red in the face and quite angry -- even if the sext other people are having will never have any affect on them or their lives. But, after all, this is a university so I feel more education on the subject is better than less.

And finally, one last piece of advice: On those late nights out on the town, always bring a designated sexter. You'll thank me in the morning.

CD Review: The Academy Is... "Santi"

Santi was supposed to be the big coming out party for Chicago-based The Academy Is… . Coming off its Fueled By Ramen debut, Almost Here, all the stars were in alignment. A big label (Atlantic), big producer (Butch Walker), big publicity (Rolling Stone's Top 10 Break-Out Bands) and singer William Beckett's big voice were all in place to secure a spot on the charts alongside fellow emo/punk/poppers that are so big these days.

Well, The Academy Is… has a big mess on their hands. Instead of pulling a page from Panic! and indulging its pop sensibilities, The Academy Is… decided to, dare we even say it, rock?

First "single" (good luck getting this burner on the radio) "We've Got A Big Mess On Our Hands," brings the hot, hot, heat. It's opening hook is massive (but too dark for the airwaves), the verses shimmering and the whole package a formidable representation of the bands talent.

So where do they go from there? "Everything We Had" is the requisite ballad with the boring name, but it's swollen chorus and lines like "I'm not a gentlemen/I can be a prick," represent the best of the genre.

"Neighbors" is where the Butch Walker influence is clear. Two-thirds of the way through the music stops, a female voice comes in to back up the lines, "And I could/but I won't," and the strong guitar lines that take it from there scream, "You can find this song on Walker's latest solo album." But, Avril Lavigne notwithstanding, Walker actually kind of rocks, too.

In other places you've got the melodic and introspective "Seed," the straight-ahead balls-to-the-wall rocker "LAX to O'Hare" and the where-the-hell-did-this-come-from garage prog rock in "Bulls in Brooklyn."

What's lacking here is that big radio-ready kick, the easily digestible lyrics the teenage audience can latch onto, that marketable, T-shirt slogan. It's simply not present on Santi.

With that gone, all that's left is a rock band starting to come into its own and indulging its best influences.

It's either a great mess or just a big one.

I Guess This Is Growing Up

This first CD I owned was Ace of Base's The Bridge. Although I hadn't heard any songs off it, I knew "The Sign" rocked my fifth-grade world, so this album must be good too.

The Bridge was priceless to me at the time - although I just found out you can buy it for 1 cent on eBay. Actually, you can have my copy for free.

I had just gotten out of the phase where the only music I knew was the "Mighty Morphin Power Rangers" theme song and whatever my dad was listening to at the time (Elvis).

However, when I told classmates that I liked "The King," they laughed at me. They didn't play this "Elvis" on Z104, and I was immediately made an outcast (although the huge glasses and premature mustache weren't helping either). Plus it was Catholic school, so most of the kids were jerks. But I didn't know it at the time.

Luckily, I was also somewhat of a rebel - I once got a 40-minute detention in the fifth grade for answering "stripper" when my teacher asked, "What are some high-paying jobs?" My teacher was a nun.

When I heard "Push" by Matchbox Twenty in seventh grade, it changed my life.

This guy, this Rob Thomas, had it going on. Not only did I love every song on Yourself or Someone Like You, but he totally made wearing guy-liner look cool. When I proclaimed my allegiance (by buying a band T-shirt and wearing it!) to Matchbox, I thought I'd get some respect.

Instead, kids laughed at me. I was immediately made an outcast (although the pimples and premature beard weren't helping either). Of course, it was a public middle school, so all the kids were jerks. But I didn't know it at the time.

Hadn't I heard of ska music, they asked? Like the Mighty Mighty Bosstones? So I went out and listened to ska music. Holy crap, does that stuff suck.

Then I found a band that could express my inner anguish: rap-rock pioneers Limp Bizkit. "Give me something to break!" they cried. It was the anti-Britney and *NSYNC, which was something new.

Everywhere I turned there was Justin Timberlake. Girls were chewing gum with his likeness on it. They were reading magazines all about him. They bought every one of his band's CDs. They went to all his concerts and swooned over him. At least that's changed.

Once I got to high school, I realized most people were jerks and I stopped caring if they liked the music that I did. Plus I got contacts and facial hair was made cool, so I wasn't immediately an outcast.

It was my turn to laugh at them. There was always something ironic about Creed's "With Arms Wide Open" playing during the high school dances. People knew that song was about having a baby, right?

Maybe that's why the teacher chaperones always made sure people weren't grinding too heavily.

Papa Roach's "Last Resort," became popular. "Cut my life into pieces!" they yelled. What were the kids at my high school cutting their lives into pieces for? Deciding which cell phone plan to get?

Boy bands were replaced on the radio by rap stars featuring some songstress singing the chorus. This allowed white guys to dress like they were Ja Rule and talk about popping E.

Those who had access to drinking discovered country music.

And suddenly, if you listened to Elvis, you were unique.

Near the end of high school I discovered this band called Dashboard Confessional playing this new kind of emotional music. Certainly, I thought, this type of music would never get played on the radio and I would never have to worry about people laughing at me for it.

Damn it.

Back to Ace of Base.

Concert Review: Brand New

Star-crossed lovers littered the walls groping each other and making out. There was two feet of orange vomit in one of the toilet stalls. Right next to it, 20 minutes before Brand New even took the stage Friday night at The Rave, a young man was staggered over in the apparent pain of either his girlfriend dumping him or having too much to drink. Smoke from cigarettes dominated every corner. The beer was flat.

The Long Island rock quartet released their third album (but first on a major label) The Devil and God Are Raging Inside of Me in November, and it has since done well at college radio, which perhaps accounted for the near-capacity crowd.

Lead singer Jesse Lacey took the stage wearing a furry bunny ears hat and launched into an abbreviated version of "Jude Law and the Semester Abroad" off Your Favorite Weapon which those in attendance completely took over halfway through.

The band continued with a few additional tracks from its debut but soon ditched it, much like the bunny ears.

It became clear that despite the loyal following of its first album, and the great critical review of its latest, sophomore release Deja Entendu remains the group's magnum opus.

What had been a sing-along crowd turned into angry sea of bodies through "Sic Transit Gloria..." The crowd still voiced every word but screamed along to "die young and save yourself," with the passionate angst of being young and having money to burn.

If Deja Entendu remains Brand New's best album, its song "Okay I Believe You, But My Tommy Gun Don't" is the centerpiece.

Imagine a poetry reading you really believe in accompanied by your favorite rock band - it hits on every emotional and sonic level. The fans couldn't have been happier to shout out, "The tongue's the only muscle on my body that works harder than my heart," along with Lacey. It was group therapy for the chronically love-struck.

Visually there weren't too many surprises (a standard light show didn't excite) except that the drum kit was set sideways - a nice change of pace allowing for people to check out drummer Brian Lane instead of hiding him.

Occasionally, Brand New falls victim to its own devices - sometimes the longer, slower songs blend in with one another. Lacey doesn't quite have the voice to carry each one through.

The band finished the concert with several songs off The Devil and God. They were well-received, but it's going to take more time to see if they have the resonance of a "Tommy Gun."

Movie Review: 300

After the Hollywood dumping-ground doldrums that are January and February, March is ushered in like a lion with the release of the Spartan swords-and-sandals epic "300."

The best thing about this film is that its creators remembered why people come to the movies in the first place - to be entertained. There's no effort here to impress people with anything other than the most mind-blistering special effects and visceral battle sequences.

Usually during these types of movies audience members must slog through a lot of teary-eyed love scenes ("Alexander"), a lot of forced dialogue ("Troy") and a lot of directorial ambitions that don't pan out (um, "Troy" and "Alexander").

"300" doesn't waste any time getting to the point. There are 300 bad-ass Spartans, and they are here, more or less, to kick a lot of Persian ass. Or more like impale them with spears, slice off their heads with swords, or a more creative version of the two. And they look great doing it.

The story is compact and follows Frank Miller's graphic novel quite closely. King Leonidas (Gerard Butler, all abs, brooding scowls and battle proclamations) ignores the common council and takes 300 of his best Spartans to defend their way of life against King Xerxes (Rodrigo Santoro). While the King leads his men to what is almost certain death, his wife, Queen Gorgo (a beautiful Lena Headey) is left to deal with the straight and crooked politicians who decide if they will send the rest of their army to help Leonidas.

Several sub-plots involving an older Spartan and his son, and a Gollum-esque deformity (an impressive Andrew Tiernan) keep things interesting and add a sense of humanity into the otherwise expressionless Spartans.

Director Zack Synder is a master at capturing the look and feel of the graphic novel. Even the wolves with glowing eyes and the battle rhinos fit right into a world grounded in blood, sweat and battle scars.

Most surprising about a film hyped for its awe-inspiring vistas is that the very best scenes of the movie are close-ups. They feel like a punch to the gut - the view is literally on the battlefield, feeling the sword severing an arm. Outstanding.

There is a single major flaw in the movie, involving Queen Gorgo. One of her actions during the film is so far out of character, it makes her return to character a few scenes later even more jarring. Disappointing.

Of lesser importance: although the visuals are stunning, they do make for a few downsides. There are supposed to be 300 Spartans, but we rarely see more than 20 at a time. And although the film's cinematography is expertly shot, giving us the illusion that the landscape goes on for miles, it has its limits. By the end of the film, we feel somewhat suffocated, knowing the actors were limited to the soundstage they were standing on.

Finally, the quick moving script has one odd detour, involving oracles and King Leonidas that does nothing to move the story forward.

Still, most of this is rendered inconsequential to the jolt of excitement that "300" provides.

Interview with director, star of "300"

If you've seen the trailer for "300," it needs little introduction. Its one-of-kind-look (all the backgrounds are jaw-dropping CGIs) coupled with the sheer size and ferocity of the battle scenes have given the project a deafening buzz.

Based on the graphic novel by Frank Miller (who also drew "Sin City"), "300" was filmed over a grueling 60-day period in a Vancouver studio.

The revered artist was intimately involved with the project. During a conference call with the Tribune, director Zack Snyder said that when they first met, Miller pretty much wanted to see "if I was going to screw up his book or not." But Miller also understood that it was Snyder's project, and that Snyder would remain true to Miller's work.

The story is based on a historical battle between 300 Spartans defending their homeland and way of life from an invading army of 1 million Persians.

But the term "based on" is key here, even though Snyder did his research. Those looking for action-packed battles instead of a History Channel lesson will be pleased: Every time Snyder faced a historical inaccuracy, he asked, "Is the truth cooler than what Frank did?" The answer? Always a resounding "no."

Besides directorial duties, Snyder is also one of the three people credited on the script.

"I have so much respect for the graphic novel," Snyder said. "I didn't want it to be Hollywood-ized. I wanted the audience to have the experience I had (reading) the novel."

This concept also carried over into the casting.

"With a graphic novel, people should look like the drawings," Snyder said. "I don't go 'who's the flavor of the week, let's make the King Leonidas.' "

Snyder felt that star Gerard Butler was able to become Leonidas. Otherwise, the cast consists of lesser-known actors.

"We wanted the movie to be the star," Snyder said. "I didn't want the US Magazine aesthetic to wander into the movie and take you out of it."

Although the movie's the star, nobody will be able to walk away without commenting on those Spartans. And here's a secret: Those muscles you're seeing aren't special effects.

"The muscles are real, absolutely," Butler said. "I don't want anyone thinking they came from anywhere else."

Butler said he trained six hours a day for seven months, and that between shooting scenes, he would go off and lift some more.

It all had to do with capturing the essence of the viscous Leonidas.

"I was very focused on the graphic novel," Butler said. "If you look at that ... it's almost monstrous and animal-like. (The Spartans) are exceptionally brutal, an absolute lack of compassion. In the end it makes them more heroic: They're completely unapologetic for their stance and their way of living."

On-set, Butler found himself identifying with the Spartan ethic and believing in his power.

"I personally felt like I could take on a million people - and I wanted to," he said. "The testosterone was flying. You're there."

At its core, "300" is essentially a swords-and-sandals epic. But where similar films like "Troy" and "Alexander" have failed in the eyes of critics and audiences, Snyder believes his film will excel.

"You're talking about a movie that tries to re-invent that genre," he said. "Those movies paved the way for me to get at it from a different angle.

"Without going outside, we were able to get the look from the book. When you went outside and shot against a rock, you got a look that was very similar to 'Troy' or 'Alexander.' "

Working on the indoor set, with everything in blue and made of fiberglass, presented an array of challenges.

Snyder summed it up this way:

"Making a movie's hard," he said. "Making a movie entirely on blue screen with lots of blue screen in 60 days - frickin' hard.

"It's a big part of the reality of filming. We're not out in a field, it is not dirty, dusty and cold - so you have to imagine all those things."

But the cast took those conditions and ran with them, according to the director.

"I credit my actors with their ability to transport themselves to ancient Sparta," Snyder said. "They can sell the reality of the performance."

There is no doubt a lot will be said of "300." It breaks ground in artistic style, how graphic novels are portrayed on the screen, and there is sure to be debate over the highly-stylized and brutal violence found on the screen.

Yet with everything being said about "300," Butler summed up the essence of it quite simply.

"We basically kick ass, kick ass and kick ass," he said. "That's the cool thing, to be a warrior and to be ultimately tough. Heroes normally have to play fair."

Karaoke King

I'm usually about 10 years behind on a lot of trends. I just got out of my Hootie and the Blowfish Cracked Rear View phase (that CD rocks!), finished celebrating a Packers Super Bowl victory (that Andre Rison has a bright future!) and just got done campaigning for Bob Dole (that guys owns a great fruit company!)

That's why it's probably no surprise that I've just discovered the greatest, most satisfying entertainment experience of my life. And it's not even "Guitar Hero II." It's something you've probably been doing for years. I'm talking, of course, about karaoke.

Being up on stage, belting out my favorite tunes after several ounces of liquid confidence, it gives me the same thought I have singing in the shower: "Wow, do I sound good."

But first, a word about what others think about my singing: When I had a role in the Rodgers and Hammerstein musical "South Pacific" ("Bali Hai" gets me every time!) in high school, the director devised a way where I was never on-stage when a song was involved. That's good directing.

She also had major qualms with me on stage for the final reprise when the play was over and everyone took bows. Luckily for those in the audience desperate to hear my magical crooning, I sang that part extra loud. I washed that monkey right off of my back! Rock!

And luckily for those who have witnessed my karaoke, I try to carry that same passion and energy into each chord of the Blessid Union classic "Hey Leonardo (She Likes Me For Me)."

Just like any art form, whether it's painting, writing or posing nude, one can't just go on stage and expect to be an all-star. Just like we learned on our cultural touchstone "American Idol," it's all about song selection. Thankfully, we don't have a Barry Manilow week (unless you're doing "Copacabana" - that song is hardcore!)

At first you might try to do something out of your range (Celine Dion covers), something really boring (any ballad) or a what-the-hell-are-they-singing-that-at-a-bar-for song (something from the Smashing Pumpkins).

There are two universal truths in the world: 1) Watching monkey's throw stuff at each other is funny. 2) Watching guys trying to dance while singing boy band songs is also funny.

Although the first one is great to constantly think about, it doesn't really apply to karaoke. However, the second one does.

There's probably no better song than "Bye, Bye, Bye" as it comes with its own totally amazing dance moves. It also has a lot of street cred because Justin Timberlake did it and look at him now.

Urban Dictionary's sixth (and in my opinion, definitive) definition of karaoke is "A painful form of 'entertainment' only to be attempted when very, very, very drunk. (See also tribute band) Used in a sentence: Big John needs a good eight pints before he is in the mood to murder 'Hotel California.' "

But the definition is missing the bigger, more beautiful picture. Karaoke is about two things - emotion and singing the overlooked gems of our generation (here's looking at you, "Ice, Ice, Baby").

And just like the poet and prophet Ice said (about karaoke): "Turn off the lights and I'll glow/ To the extreme I rock a mic like a vandal/ light up a stage and wax a chump like a candle." No doubt, Ice. Once on stage, I too "flow like a harpoon daily and nightly."

Top 10 Movies That Define This College Generation

1. "Old School"

(2003) Directed by Todd Phillips. Starring: Will Ferrell, Luke Wilson, Vince Vaughn, Jeremy Piven

It's indeed "The Godfather" of modern college comedies - the more you watch it, the funnier it gets. Finish this sentence: "Remember that one scene in 'Old School'…" Yep, pretty much anything works in there.

Why we like it is summed up by the film's tagline, "All the fun of college, none of the education."

Top Quotes:

Frank: "We're going streaking!" and "Fill it up again! Fill it up again! Once it hits your lips, it's so good!"

Beanie: "Oh, yeah. Cheeeeese. ... Didn't we lock you in the dumpster one time?"

Dean Pritchard: "I got out."

2. "Swingers"

(1996) Directed by Doug Liman. Starring: Jon Favreau, Vince Vaughn

Remember when you rocked out to Big Bad Voodoo Daddy all the time? Neither do we, but this buddy flick captures the 90s swing era (or rather, year) to a T. Along the way we're introduced to a group of guys just trying to make it in Hollywood, but they sound like a group of guys from Anywhere, USA. Money, baby!

Top Quotes:

Mike: "Haven't you seen 'Boyz N The Hood'? Now one of us is going to get shot."

Trent: "I wish they still had fights in this game so I could bitch-slap Wayne."

Trent: "There's nothing wrong with letting the girls know that you're money and that you want to party."

3. "Garden State"

(2004) Directed by Zach Braff. Starring: Zach Braff, Natalie Portman, Peter Sarsgaard, Ian Holm

This film is our generation's "The Graduate." And each year, the movie gains more notoriety and the soundtrack looks more visionary. Braff's only script and directorial turn, it's his ode to the phrase 'you can't go home again' - a feeling many experience after living at college.

Top Quotes:

Andrew Largeman: "You know, this necklace makes me think of this totally random memory of my mother. I was a little kid, and I was crying for one reason or another. And she was cradling me, rocking me back and forth, and I can just remember the silver balls rolling around. And there was like snot running down my nose. And she offered me her sleeve and told me to blow my nose into it. And I can remember, even as a little kid, thinking to myself, this is love ... this is love."

4. "Office Space"

(1999) Directed by Mike Judge. Starring: Ron Livingston, Jennifer Aniston

Before "The Office" became "THE Office" there was "Office Space," a heartwarming tale of Bobs, Michael Bolton and whether or not you're wearing enough "flair."

Top Quotes:

Dom Portwood: "Hi, Peter. What's happening?"

Peter Gibbons: "Well, I generally come in at least 15 minutes late, ah, I use the side door - that way Lumbergh can't see me, heh heh - and, uh, after that I just sorta space out for about an hour."

Bob Porter: "Da-uh? Space out?"

Peter Gibbons: "Yeah, I just stare at my desk; but it looks like I'm working. I do that for probably another hour after lunch, too. I'd say in a given week I probably only do about 15 minutes of real, actual, work."

5. "Fight Club"

(1999) Directed by David Fincher. Starring: Brad Pitt, Edward Norton

Responsible for more missing teeth than the Tooth Fairy, this film inspired thousands of testosterone-filled boys to emulate the fights they saw. Regardless of real-life violence, this film features enough pseudo-philosophical ramblings to keep any self-respecting college student analyzing it for weeks.

Top Quotes:

Tyler Durden: "Man, I see in fight club the strongest and smartest men who've ever lived. I see all this potential, and I see squandering. God damn it, an entire generation pumping gas, waiting tables; slaves with white collars. Advertising has us chasing cars and clothes, working jobs we hate so we can buy s--- we don't need. We're the middle children of history, man. No purpose or place. We have no Great War. No Great Depression. Our Great War's a spiritual war ... our Great Depression is our lives. We've all been raised on television to believe that one day we'd all be millionaires, and movie gods, and rock stars. But we won't. And we're slowly learning that fact. And we're very, very pissed off."

Tyler Durden: "You are not a beautiful, unique snowflake."

6. "Anchorman: The Legend of Ron Burgundy"

(2004) Directed by Adam McKay. Starring: Will Ferrell, Christina Applegate, Steve Carell

"Anchorman" finally delivered what we all wanted: a careful dissection of newsroom policies in the 70s. Oh wait, actually it delivered Will Ferrell channeling his Robert Goulet character and the directions to "Pleasure Town."

Top Quotes:

Ron Burgundy: "I don't know how to put this, but I'm kind of a big deal."

Ron Burgundy: "It's so damn hot ... milk was a bad choice."

7. "Clerks"

(1994) Directed by Kevin Smith. Starring: Brian O'Halloran

Shot in black and white, "Clerks" perfectly captured the working-class angst of pretty much anyone who has ever worked in retail.

Top Quotes:

Randal Graves: "Which did you like better? 'Jedi' or 'The Empire Strikes Back'?"

Dante Hicks: "Empire."

Randal Graves: "Blasphemy."

Dante Hicks: "Empire had the better ending. I mean, Luke gets his hand cut off, finds out Vader's his father, Han gets frozen and taken away by Boba Fett. It ends on such a down note. I mean, that's what life is, a series of down endings. All 'Jedi' had was a bunch of Muppets."

8. "The Boondock Saints"

(1999) Directed by Troy Duffy. Starring: Willem Dafoe, Sean Patrick Flanery, Norman Reedus

Almost exclusively a hit on the college circuit, its hooks remain obvious: a powerhouse performance from Dafoe, highly-stylized Tarantino violence and a whole lot of Irish style fightin' and cursin'. Plus, outside of those 18- to 22-year-olds, nobody really knows about it.

Top Quotes:

Doc: "Why don't you make like a tree, and get the f--- outta here?"

9. "Donnie Darko"

(2001) Directed by Richard Kelly. Starring: Jake Gyllenhaal, Drew Barrymore, Patrick Swayze

This used to be the movie you could show to all your friends, and when they didn't get it, you got to do a little 'indie-dance' and proclaim how stupid they were. Times were good then. But Kelly just released a long director's cut that clears everything up! Damn him!

Top Quotes:

Donnie: (shouts) "First of all, Papa Smurf didn't create Smurfette. Gargamel did. She was sent in as Gargamel's evil spy with the intention of destroying the Smurf village. But the overwhelming goodness of the Smurf way of life transformed her. And as for the whole gang-bang scenario, it just couldn't happen. Smurfs are asexual. They don't even have … reproductive organs under those little, white pants. It's just so illogical, you know, about being a Smurf."

Sean Smith: (pause) "Dammit, Donnie. Why you gotta get all smart on us?"

10. "Mean Girls"

(2004) Directed by Mark Waters. Starring Lindsay Lohan, Rachel McAdams

As we're learning with several movies on this list, some just keep getting better and more relevant with age. A modest hit when it first came out, the sheer wit of Tina Fey's screenplay and the sheer truth behind cliques are revealed in hilarious detail in "Mean Girls."

Top Quotes:

Janis: "Gretchen Wieners knows everybody's business, she knows everything about everyone."

Damian: "That's why her hair is so big, it's full of secrets."

Janis: "And evil takes a human form in Regina George. Don't be fooled because she may seem like your typical selfish, backstabbing slut-faced ho-bag, but in reality, she's so much more than that."